Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Let your food be your medicine and your medicine be yourfood~Hippocrates

(That was sent to me by a dear lady friend on a day that I needed some serious pick me up)
Just because I am a strong woman, a little rough around the edges and NOT afraid to say what is on my mind does not mean I am impenetrable to being left out, not thanked, or above having my feelings hurt.

What it does mean is I call shit like it is, and courtesy of a near and dear friend of mind I have learned that I have to stand up for myself more. I am done being bull dozed or having people assume I can handle something someone else couldn't because I am tough.

I am over being insulted and attacked for speaking my mind. I spend my days reading and researching all, yes... ALL angles of food and nutrition. I am not perfect and there is NO perfect diet but there is a lot of evidence out there pointing to how broke we are when it comes to how to eat and how unhealthy we are as a nation.

We are a nation of sick care not health care or even much preventative care. What I say, I say out of LOVE and for pure information dissemination. I pass on any research I can. Good or bad. You don't have to agree with me or give a shit just don't attack me.  Heck just don't read what I have to say if you don't like what I say. 

I, believe it or not, wear my heart on my sleeve. I am incredibly flexible to a fault. I will take shit and more shit and even more shit until I reach my shit threshold.  Once I'm there, well then I'm inflexible! I'm done. As I'm getting older and having been walked on by one too many people my shit threshold is getting shorter. 

I know how offended people get about the way they live their lives. THIS IS MY JOB and I take it very seriously. This is NOT a hobby for me.  I work with people ALL the time and see how attached they are to food and how much comfort food brings.  AND GUESS WHAT?  I KNOW I am an emotional eater.  When things are bad I reach for JUNK FOOD.  I just do.  See...I'm not any different.  I have been fat, I have let food control me, I have been on a 1 gallon bag of pharmaceuticals  to cure what ails me.  Been there and done that and I've burned that t-shirt and am taking a different approach to life.

I will continue to be strong and to look at ALL sides of  an issue and not fall prey to to American laziness of believing what I see, hear, or read FROM ONE SOURCE without question.  I QUESTION EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME.  I JUST DO.  I am always looking for a better way to get healthy, stay healthy, and be stronger. 

Lastly, I NEVER say anything ever with the intention of hurting someone.  That is just not me, that's not my MO.  So, if I have said something that offends you I didn't likely know that I did it.  I don't like hurting others, in fact I LOVE to help people.  So just know, I'm not out to make you feel anything other than convicted in your ways and happy with your life.


Today was my 4 week post-op anniversary!  I was so excited to go to Columbia to see my doc and nurse.  I had just had my youngest daughter point out to me a few days ago that I was standing upright completely for the first time since surgery, and I was!!  Shoulders back and everything this week, it felt great!  Not able to be maintained all day but awesome all the same.

The docs were all impressed with my progress and the scar and thankfully not worried that my belly button might be infected.  I got out of the shower Tuesday night pretty sure it might be infected as I had never seen it so red (granted I do not spend A LOT of time looking at it).  Happy that there is no infection there.  I can now start massaging (insert gag here) my navel, not sure why...I know they told me however when they were telling me I was breaking out into a nervous sweat :)  I'm such a wuss when it comes to touching the stomach. 

Monday, April 1, 2013

Bloating and Gas

So we went to our fave little dinner spot on Saturday night in Springfield MO and I got my fave dish and am still paying for it. I have never been more bloated and distended and in total discomfort. I feel like my belly is trying to push through my scar! It hurts. That's what I get for eating junk for first time in 3 weeks.

3 gas x and almost 6 hrs later and I'm still miserable and sipping on some mint tea.
Maybe I will be over it tomorrow.

Oh and can I say sneezing and coughing...yah not my favorite things to do! It is the strangest feeling in my belly button when I sneeze, can't say strange good either.

So over the weekend I have noticed my girdles that I have been wearing since day 1 are no longer staying where they Are supposed to and are sliding down to mid-stomach, which is painful. The nerves reattaching in my abdominal skin produces the feeling of being scratched by carpenter nails even with just the light brush of clothes and with the girdle slipping its producing pain. So YaY that means its too big and my swelling is going down. All except in my legs which seem to be retaining water the most :(. Right now with all this internal gas I can't say I feel not bloated. I feel like a fat tick on a dogs back! (Grew up on a farm, saw plenty of ticks...hate those things). Anyway, ordered a pair of Spax super control to see if that will work for my replacement garment. to shower.

Friday, March 29, 2013


YEP, I went to the gym today!  BUT I didn't do a thing.  I watched my husband and a friend complete a WOD to turn in for regional's for Cross Fit.  My husband was laughing and shaking his head at me walking across the gym.  When I sat down he says, "Your WOD, walking across the gym!".  Yep, I admit it, I'm slow.  That is one thing I have noticed that is driving me nuts, I HAVE TO WALK SLOW.  I normally lap people, walk fast, walk fast, walk fast!  Oh well.  I'll get there.

I didn't sleep for shit last night.  I think it's my hormones and supplements out of whack.  I cannot wait to see the Naturopath again next week with the hopes that he has some answers from all of my blood and urine work.

OK, enough procrastinating.  I have a paper

Thursday, March 28, 2013

3 weeks post-op

So, today is 3 weeks post-op!  In looking back over the last few days I have done quite a bit all by myself.  I have driven the truck, I have made dinner (omelets and asparagus), I can remove my own girdle (big deal as it was gagging me out originally), I have done just some regular Mom things too. 

I don't have an appt. to see the PS today, I'm going next week for my 1 month!  Can't wait.  I think the girdle I'm wearing is getting to be a little on the big side, which means my swelling is going down.  Can't wait to get a different girdle.  These things are high on the super-duper sexy list LET ME TELL YA!

Jason has a Cross Fit endurance certification this weekend so we will be spending it in a hotel.  Should be interesting as hotel life after our past summer isn't something I consider fun.  Girls are stoked to swim, I however can't swim and pretty sure I cannot even submerge myself so likely no hot tub (going to have to research that one again).  So, I'm thinking a movie. 

Well, off to load the girls up.  Think we will hit the library and who knows what else, options are limited here at Fort Lost in the Woods.

Oh!  And!  Jason is submitting his packet!  Can you say bring on civilian life?  I know I can!

Pictures to follow.  I'll take them this evening with some handy-dandy husband help so I get good angles and so you can see how much better it looks.  My baby C said it looks just like I'm bruised now, so I am pretty sure the scabs are mostly gone.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

What did you do today???

I went to Panera and found out my appetite is still diminished but damn their tea tastes good.

Now I'm at the library and yes I'm driving!!!

Poor baby C is having tummy troubles. I let the girls have a 'treat' at Panera  get a bagel even though I knew better. C has been getting progressively more sensitive to gluten and this bagel laid her out. She was walking around like I did for 2 weeks post tummy tuck. I feel terrible for agreeing she could eat it. We came home and she is napping. That's the end of gluten for her poor belly.

While she naps I'm picking up some and cleaning a few things. I just made a green juice and am now watching Bizzare Foods.

Monday, March 25, 2013

100% Honesty

So, I started blogging about my TT so that others considering what I had considered for 5 years would have somewhere to go for TRUE no bull shit information on everything that goes on from start to finish of the entire TT process.  So, in the effort of being blatantly honest here is something I did not expect...I am finally able to completely shower myself.  Jason has showered me, I have used a 5 gallon bucket and hose tub bath.   I use Ivory soap and wash cloths or just my hand to clean myself.  So, here goes...last night as I am showering myself BY MYSELF for the first time I reached around to wash my back side and I feel something that feels like sticky, wet, balled up toilet paper from just above my anus to the top of my arse crack...and yes this girl sports an ass.  I am a lifter and a CrossFitter.  SO, you can imagine my shock, disgust, and concern when I felt this strange substance.  I immediately look at it and it looks like dead skin.  I then yell at my husband to come quick, he look, inspects it and agrees it's just dead skin that has collected there.  I come to realize that last night was the first time I was able to relax my ass enough and reach around enough to find these glorious pills of dead skin in my ass. 

Yep, there you have it another glorious side effect of a TT.