Friday, March 29, 2013


YEP, I went to the gym today!  BUT I didn't do a thing.  I watched my husband and a friend complete a WOD to turn in for regional's for Cross Fit.  My husband was laughing and shaking his head at me walking across the gym.  When I sat down he says, "Your WOD, walking across the gym!".  Yep, I admit it, I'm slow.  That is one thing I have noticed that is driving me nuts, I HAVE TO WALK SLOW.  I normally lap people, walk fast, walk fast, walk fast!  Oh well.  I'll get there.

I didn't sleep for shit last night.  I think it's my hormones and supplements out of whack.  I cannot wait to see the Naturopath again next week with the hopes that he has some answers from all of my blood and urine work.

OK, enough procrastinating.  I have a paper

Thursday, March 28, 2013

3 weeks post-op

So, today is 3 weeks post-op!  In looking back over the last few days I have done quite a bit all by myself.  I have driven the truck, I have made dinner (omelets and asparagus), I can remove my own girdle (big deal as it was gagging me out originally), I have done just some regular Mom things too. 

I don't have an appt. to see the PS today, I'm going next week for my 1 month!  Can't wait.  I think the girdle I'm wearing is getting to be a little on the big side, which means my swelling is going down.  Can't wait to get a different girdle.  These things are high on the super-duper sexy list LET ME TELL YA!

Jason has a Cross Fit endurance certification this weekend so we will be spending it in a hotel.  Should be interesting as hotel life after our past summer isn't something I consider fun.  Girls are stoked to swim, I however can't swim and pretty sure I cannot even submerge myself so likely no hot tub (going to have to research that one again).  So, I'm thinking a movie. 

Well, off to load the girls up.  Think we will hit the library and who knows what else, options are limited here at Fort Lost in the Woods.

Oh!  And!  Jason is submitting his packet!  Can you say bring on civilian life?  I know I can!

Pictures to follow.  I'll take them this evening with some handy-dandy husband help so I get good angles and so you can see how much better it looks.  My baby C said it looks just like I'm bruised now, so I am pretty sure the scabs are mostly gone.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

What did you do today???

I went to Panera and found out my appetite is still diminished but damn their tea tastes good.

Now I'm at the library and yes I'm driving!!!

Poor baby C is having tummy troubles. I let the girls have a 'treat' at Panera  get a bagel even though I knew better. C has been getting progressively more sensitive to gluten and this bagel laid her out. She was walking around like I did for 2 weeks post tummy tuck. I feel terrible for agreeing she could eat it. We came home and she is napping. That's the end of gluten for her poor belly.

While she naps I'm picking up some and cleaning a few things. I just made a green juice and am now watching Bizzare Foods.

Monday, March 25, 2013

100% Honesty

So, I started blogging about my TT so that others considering what I had considered for 5 years would have somewhere to go for TRUE no bull shit information on everything that goes on from start to finish of the entire TT process.  So, in the effort of being blatantly honest here is something I did not expect...I am finally able to completely shower myself.  Jason has showered me, I have used a 5 gallon bucket and hose tub bath.   I use Ivory soap and wash cloths or just my hand to clean myself.  So, here goes...last night as I am showering myself BY MYSELF for the first time I reached around to wash my back side and I feel something that feels like sticky, wet, balled up toilet paper from just above my anus to the top of my arse crack...and yes this girl sports an ass.  I am a lifter and a CrossFitter.  SO, you can imagine my shock, disgust, and concern when I felt this strange substance.  I immediately look at it and it looks like dead skin.  I then yell at my husband to come quick, he look, inspects it and agrees it's just dead skin that has collected there.  I come to realize that last night was the first time I was able to relax my ass enough and reach around enough to find these glorious pills of dead skin in my ass. 

Yep, there you have it another glorious side effect of a TT. 

As promised...Pictures post steri strips

SO I AM NOT KIDDING BRACE YOURSELF OK....maybe that sounds Dramatic...however I find these pictures to be gore-y.  I'm lying down kind of crunched up so I can remove the strips at the time the pictures were taken.  I was itching so bad from the steri-strips that were still in place I just couldn't take it anymore.  I did them one by one and it was a process let me tell you.  A gut wrenching, going to vomit, gagged a little each time process. 

I am still quite swollen but happy.  Jason marvels at me more and more each day...and to be clear I am specifically meaning at night when I am in the shower at my most bloated.  He just keeps saying...I know you can't see the forest for the tree's but I CAN!  Have faith my love.  And if you don't love the way you look after the 6 months required to not have swelling we will fix it. 

He is just too wonderful for words.  So, anyway...brace yourself and look if you dare.

Right Hip

Mid-Center abdomen
Full-frontal almost all strips off at this point

Also, since I have been slacking, yesterday...Sunday this is what I did: :-)
Not as enticing as sex, drugs, and rock and roll however that was my day. I managed to sleep until 11am and woke feeling I had sex...with my beloved of 18 years...not just a random person (just to clarify :)) and then we went to brunch in Rolla and to the library for research books.  Needless to say I spent the rest of the day in the recliner.   If you're in the area and looking for a brunch place go check it out.  I was pleased with my omelet. 
Benton Square

Can you say too much????

I couldn't take it anymore today and I asked Jason to leave the truck so I could get out of the house.  I went up to Rolla, MO with the girls.  I figure the sitting and driving doesn't bother me, so I would just take it easy and hit a few stores that didn't/wouldn't require a ton of walking.  Went first to  Nature Girls Health Food Store as I needed some arrowroot powder to use in place of corn starch and Jason needed a new bar of soap since we have gone all "Granola Crunchy" and don't use products full of chemicals that aren't meant to be in or on our body.  It was a cute little store full of lots of goodies, and the owner/manager (didn't catch exactly her name or who she was, just assuming) gave my girls each a pear that 'tastes like candy'.  They loved it. 

I was feeling a little tired but really, REALLY wanted to go to Panera for lunch.  In my head I saw it as going in, ordering food, sitting down, enjoying a dinner.  What really happened...walked in to find that the line went to the door, in good faith I held on thinking it would be fast.  I dressed much warmer today than normal (hence the snow and ice outside) and quickly realized I was going to pay for that.  My long sleeves, jacket and winter coat about did me in, and while I'm waiting I am being quizzed by my girls 'can I have....' blah 'can I get a treat?'....blah...I'm sweating, my abs are hurting, I am losing my patience just wishing I had someone to lean on.  There didn't seem to be a person in line in front of me who had ever eaten at Panera before.  I had to beg the girls in a stern, don't mess with me way...let me be, I'll order the food YOU NOW HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF ME!  Do you see the sweat on my face?  It's not there 'cause I'm feeling good. 

Ordered the food only to have to guy taking my order not be able to hear me because the worker next to him was having a coughing fit.  YEAH...just what I want to see happen right in front of where my food is made.  Many people stepped back.  Oh, and I forgot to mention the elderly couple behind me, behind me so close I could smell their fabric softener, I could hear their every word "oooh that cheese babka looks good Bob".  I wanted to scream and die but I was committed at this point and not about to try to climb the mountain of getting the girls out without a scene etc...

Finally, got our food and sat down.  T was a huge help once she knew I was about to lose my mind in pain.  I took some Motrin and peeled off some layers of clothes.  I was a little over cautious I noticed about people getting close to me, moving too fast, and just being to close in general.  Thinking HOW do I protect my mid-section?  OMG all these people and un-ruly, on spring break kids are getting to close.  I wanted my 6'6" husband and natural protective barrier.  People just don't get close to him.

We ate, we relaxed and I felt better.  So I decided to go seek out the Naturopath in the area I had been asking about.  After a few missed attempts I ended up just where I needed to be, Kessinger Diagnostic Center.  I have been needing to have my hormones checked since this summer and asked my regular physician to do it for me.  They declined as I have a blood clotting disorder and said it didn't matter what my panel said no one would treat me.  SO, guess what?  I did a boat load of research, read a ton of books and found out that's just OLD SCHOOL.  Away from the Allopath for this and head to a Naturopath.  Considering my family history of hormonal imbalance, and how I felt this summer, coupled with some new things rearing their heads (crying, crying, crying and now sugar cravings with a few other random things) it's time to get tested.  It's an awesome location, great staff, and I'm ready to go back and get tested. 
Kessinger Diagnostic Center

Newest favorite book I'm reading and cannot put down?  "If Naturopaths are "Quacks"...Then I Must Be a Duck" by Shauna K. Young Link to book here.  Changed my life in just 2 days. 

And, that's that.  I am home.  I am exhausted and I have a boat load of homework.  Hope you are all well.  I will post my pictures from the day I removed the steri-strips soon.

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Prone to tears

I am an emotional jack-in-the-box, I'm an unpredictable mess. You cannot begin to guess what emotion is going to come spilling out of me at any given moment.

One thing I don't know is if this is related to the surgery specifically or what is going on with me. It's been a few days of this and there's no predicting when it will happen. Jason has seen me cry so many times today and there's no predicting it , he can be being nice or there was a moment of arguing and I was sobbing.
I am stressed because my class is 2 weeks from over and I have a 10 page paper due and a handful of essays but really there is nothing else wrong. Maybe I should research this some more.

I guess it could also be that I'm still recovering as everyone is quick to remind me. I guess, no I know that I think I should be doing more, going more, not wearing out so quickly...but fact of the matter is I'm still in recovery.

Maybe ill just relax. Maybe just maybe I need to be a little less hard on myself.

Friday, March 22, 2013


Yep, I'm nervous.  It is my 2 week post surgery check up.  Jason drug a 5 gallon bucket into the bathroom so I could sit on it (positioned on a towel so it didn't slip) so I could wax my furry and expanding eye brows.  In the mean time I turned on my straightening iron on ironed my hair a bit so as to look like I had energy and now gave a shit about what I looked liked after almost 2 weeks in a recliner.  So, here is me plopped on couch ready for the 2 hour ride (note painting my Grandpa did of me on wall in background LOL)


So, we made it to Missouri University Hospital and Jason dropped me off at the door with C, my little 5 year old leading me in.  Thank GOD a nurse saw me all doubled over (seemed super worried that a woman was walking face down being led by a toddler) and so she was super helpful and got me this extra-large wheel-chair.  Something I noticed while I was there is these wheel-chairs are almost so large they don't fit through doorways! I didn't see a single NORMAL size wheel-chair. :(

Here is me all nervous (and drugged up, Jason after having my drains removed last week was worried about any trauma that may befall me today, so he had me take a pain killer and muscle relaxed prior to seeing the doc.  He was making fun of how relaxed my face was when he took this!  Look, sporting my Life As RX socks still!  My PS Resident who is handsome and I threatened to punch last week, (sorry man if you read this I still feel bad about that) and my Doc, Doc A came in and told me basically today is the day you stand.  I questioned them, yah as IF I know anything about it and tried.  I was so nervous I got up about 85% straight, got hot, sweaty and had to sit down. I tried again and then quit, we or I got nervous I may pass out.  Jason and Charlee were in there with us and Jason just kept saying how cool the incision was.  ANYWAY...funny story.  So Dr. A is just amazing and after I sat down I had to tell her this.  "So, Dr. A. I already told Kassie but I feel I need to tell you, and Doc (gesturing to the Resident) you'll have to forgive me cause you're a dude but you're in Plastics so I'm sure you'll expect worse.  Before my surgery because of the weight of the flap I felt like I had a frowny vagina (More like the skin above vagina, the PUBUS, that is the correct anatomical term) and NOW I look down and I'm like WOW I CAN SEE my vagina!  No more frowning!!!"...Doc A.  God love her was red, I am pretty sure the Resident blushed and Doc A pointed out I was blushing as well.  I just felt as though she deserved to know that that was ONE thing I had noticed almost right away.

So, Dr. A's orders no ointments or anything on the incision, let the butterfly strips fall off on their own and it will be about a year before I have the thin, white, incision line.  In the meantime it'll change some.  She also suggested I figure out a weight I'm happy at and not fluctuate a lot.  No crash dieting for fighting weights and be careful of the same if I wanted to compete for Figure or Body Building because the constant weight changes can lead to the stretching out of the skin again as we as women tend to hold our excess weight in the stomach and hips etc.

So, here is me as upright as I got yesterday standing outside La Terraza grill in Columbia.  I wanted some of their chicken soup and chunky guacamole.  I have had a serious decrease in appetite as my energy expenditure is way down but the soup tasted good even if I brought home 3/4 of it.

I have a 3 week and 4 week check up with Doc. A.  Especially if I can't get myself/make myself stand up 100%.  Although, today I walked around the house for about 20 minutes and did a few small things and it wore me the heck out.  Until tomorrow. 

Wednesday, March 20, 2013


I love my husband.

I must have the best husband in the entire world.  He has been making sure I'm up and in the recliner in the living room for going on two weeks.  He makes me whatever breakfast I'm feeling like (a juice or a protein pancake) and comes back for lunch, and makes sure there is dinner.  Oh, and it isn't just for me, it is for me, its for our two kids and our two dogs. 

NOT to mention he has done all the laundry, all the house cleaning, and all the cooking without a single complaint mind you!  What more could a girl ask for?  Oh, that's right, lastly a man who isn't above wiping my back side the first few days because I just wasn't capable.  I couldn't twist my body comfortably so he did the job.  Like he said, at this point we have 2 kids he has seen it all.  He will sit and stare at my incisions too when they are exposed.  He really thinks it's all pretty cool, especially the belly button.  Me, on the on the other hand, am glad I did it, don't want to stare at it. 

That is me standing at about a 45-90 degree angle today.  Steri-strips are still in place as are the belly button covers and my R side drain spot.  It's getting itchy so I'm sure that is a good sign.  Jason took that pic and he's all like "THAT IS SOOO COOL!"

And lastly, this is my home spot.  My brown recliner, my pillows, my two tables full of everything I need at my finger tips, my computer, and all the new crocheting stuff I am hoping to learn how to do soon.  Jason's on his way to get me out of this house.  He is taking me to Rolla to Panera!  What a big date!  But, hey it isn't my recliner!

Tuesday, March 19, 2013


Today I finally feel as though the meds aren't really messing with my head nor making me sleepy.  Maybe, that's because I haven't really needed any.  I'm moving better and feel all together good.  I have a CRAP ton of school work to complete that I think is going to require an extension as I was laid out more than I expected on those narcotics. 

I have to schedule a few more classes for the next few months and try to find a good program for Naturopathic medicine.  Jason is gone three nights a week now which is proving to be challenging when I can't move, but hope that as the weather improves it will be an abundance of girl time.

So, I'm off to do some school work.  FOCUS....FOCUS...FOCUS....

I'm back and let's just say time has caught up with me.  I'm beat.  I have so much more homework to do tonight, however I am not sure how much more I will get done.  I feel as though I'm getting better with each day.  I just finished my day with soup.  Jason says that I'm wasting away.  Good-bye CF legs!  I honestly think I'm going to go right into running as soon as I'm cleared.  I'll take a break from the heavy power lifting I have been doing for a while.  Not that I don't love my CF thighs, I just like fitting into my jeans :)

Off to try to read, or write, or be productive as my children bicker endlessly next to me. 
Eat Well.

As I type I am watching Eat, Pray, Love.  One of my all time favorite easy reads and good girl movies.  Under the Tuscan Sun was yesterday.  I figure by the time I can NOT sit in this recliner I'll have seen all the movies I love and wanted to watch again.

One of my drain sites wasn't fully healed tonight and I didn't notice it until I went to the bathroom today and I looked down and noticed I had bloody seepage through my new pajamas.  I unhooked my girdle only to find the seepage looked like red tinged runny mayo..gag!  I had T get more gauze and triple-antibiotic ointment.  I doctored it up and then placed a call in to the on call plastic surgeon.  He called me back, quickly finding out he was one of the 7 year residents who pulled out my drain, the one who I said to "I have to be honest my first instinct was to punch you upside your head when you did that!" (cut the stitch to my drain pre-drain removal).  He kinda laughed, and I assured him I wouldn't hit him, just that was my gut instinct because it hurt so badly.  ANYWAY, he assured me the drainage was normal sans there wasn't skin color change around the site, and it didn't hurt or have a foul odor.  So, looks good.  Still seeping some this morning but I guess it has to go somewhere. 

I woke up with noticeable itching on the suture site.  Hopefully all the good food I'm downing and all the rest I am seriously adhereing to is going to propel me forward into being able to stand up straight in a few days. 

I have my next follow up on Thursday.  Until then 2 more days of sitting on my posterior chain. 

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Hip to Hip

So my husband didn't exaggerate. I'm truly stitched hip to but had not seen that til I got out of the shower tonight.

I probably over did it yesterday, so I'm going to go back to sleep for a bit while C watches Tangled.

Can't wait to be myself again!

Prepare yourself for a little gore PICTURES at LAST

Last night I made myself shower again, not because I needed it mind you, but because I figure the only was I'm going to get even kind of used to my scar and not having my girdle on is to take it all off and sit in the shower. 

So, I let him take my girdle off and I got in the shower.  I sat on the seat and just let the water run over me.  I was shaking, shaking from anticipation and fear of the unknown.  Was it going to hurt?  Were my stitches going to fail?  Little stupid things.  But I did it.  I showered and it actually felt good.  I won't look at my scar though.  It's still raw and scary and not far off from what Jason described, but I have no regrets!  I no longer have a flap of skin sagging or hanging on my thighs. 

I've watched a ton of movies, "Under the Tuscan Sun", "Beasts of the Southern Wild", tons of Giadia from the Food Network, House Hunters International (in order to figure out where we are going to go once we throw the deuces to Uncle Sam), and against my best judgement I allowed myself to indulge in Millionaire Matchmakers and LA Shrinks, and who knows what else in my drug educed stupor.  I can watch plenty of junk but I can't seem to concentrate on much.  Reading, words just blur together.  Jason just made me take pain killers cause things were starting to hurt, so my ability to type is dwindling. 

I'll catch you all as soon as I'm good, and post more pictures.

Saturday, March 16, 2013

My chef

Jason made me browned butter Brussels sprouts and spicy shepherdess pie! He's awesome!


So, the Doc and my beloved nurse assured me I could shower.  Jason insisted we do it last night.  Me, yeah I could have waited another week.  Whatever?!  Right?  I have baby wipes, I'm doing NOTHING and I can take a spit bath.  WRONG.  I gave in.  I let my husband convince me to undress and stand/hunch and remove my girdle.  THAT act alone was a moment for panic.  I THOUGHT FOR SURE  something was going to fall out, fall apart, break...something.  So I'm leaning naked against my walker as he is figuring out how to un-hook and un-zip the girdle on the side.  I hobble hunched over to the shower, take a tenuous step up and collapse onto the shower seat.  Being honest I was in tears and wrought with fear.  I didn't know what it was going to feel like and I was terrified to look at myself!  I sat there long enough for the water to run over me and for me to rub a soapy cloth over me.  (I do have to work on getting the tape residue off that I am allergic to... However last night was not that night).  I had Jason taking pictures throughout because I knew some day I would want to see them.  He kept saying "Oh this is COOL!" and "You look like Jack the Pumpkin King from the Nightmare before Christmas", which by the way is a movie I HAVE NOT SEEN so I didn't know what the F that meant.  I knew I was naked and vulnerable, shaking, and scared to death. 
So, there you have it, just looked up Jack.  Sadly, I see what he means.  I know he wasn't trying to be mean.  I know he was being honest and this stuff fascinates him.  It made my eldest a little ill and sad, my youngest said "Huh.  That's kinda cool!" 
I'll post pics soon, I just have to figure out how to censor them for the internet, or if I have to do that.  Pretty sure there's nothing visible that's important but I'll do some double checking.
So, will I shower tonight?  Undecided.  I don't know if I can handle the stress.  However yesterday was a day of firsts as I slept in my own bed and not the recliner.  Jason picked me up, situated me and I slept like a baby.  I also traversed into the kitchen for the first time yesterday with my walker. 
Little by little and step by step!!

Friday, March 15, 2013

So, the drains

Yesterday we went to Columbia for my 1 week post op appointment.  I worked really hard all week to sit around and do nothing so that my drains wouldn't produce much swelling and the doc could remove them for me. 

We got to the hospital in plenty of time and I was thankful to find someone willing to give me a wheel chair.  Jason wheeled me to the Surgery clinic and we got right in.  A male doc I had never seen before came in with a nurse to get me situated and on the exam table.  That was terrifying momentarily because other than the day of surgery I HAD NOT allowed myself to lay back.  I have been living in a recliner.  So after laying me back my SUPER AWESOME SWEET nurse who should be nurse of the year came in and chatted with me.  She is 4 weeks post op and looked great.  She was sharing post op stories with me and some of the crazy things she found herself in. 

So both Doc's, mine and the male came back in.  Doc A, my doc agrees I can have my drains out as they were averaging like 5ml-3ml of fluid.  So we are talking and I'm asked if I took any pain pills.  I said No, because I wanted to be lucid and able to understand them and ask questions.  This, I soon came to find out was a STUPID idea.  Now, mind you I had to leave my darling husband and two girls in the waiting room.  Love them to death, but I wanted to make sure I heard everything and was able to ask any questions.  So, the docs removed all the tape and come to find out I have an allergy to tape adhesive, which explains my intense need to scratch all my skin under my girdle for the past week.  Doc A said my butterfly (?) strips holding the incision together looked just fine. 

On to the drains.  Here I am thinking I have maybe 1-2"of drain pipe inside my skin AT MOST, they cut the sutures holding the drains in place which was excruciating (but at this point EVERYTHING to do with these drains was tear inducing).  Everyone kept saying one deep breath in, blow out and they will be done.  Everyone being, my mom :)  Well, so they say ok, breath in, breath out and we will pull them out at the same time,  GUESS WHAT?  THOSE M'F'ing  drains NO SHIT went all the way my abdominal wall on BOTH sides and rested right about where my bra strap was across my mid section right underneath my breasts.  THAT WAS THE WORST, MOST NAUSEATING, STRESSFUL, HORRID, WRETCHED thing I have ever had done.  I was squeezing my dear nurses hand so hard.  I got super hot, and sweaty and not sure if I made a noise.  BUT IT HURT!

They fixed up the sights and got my new clean girdle on and I'm pretty sure that was that.  It took me a bit to recover from the trauma.  For future reference IF I EVER DO SOMEHTING LIKE THIS AGAIN ALWAYS go to the doc having taken a pain pill. 

We left the office with more prescriptions and headed on our way to where? Home you might guess?  Nope, Jimmy Johns.  Family had to eat.  I sat in car, took my pain killers and hugged a pillow for 2-1/2 hours.  That was a very stressful day.  I am truly learning just how badly a small amount of stress can affect a person.

Today has been good.  I tried to go the day without meds, Jason got mad and told me to quit soldiering up and take some drugs.  He then said he was glad he was going to be home for 2 more days to keep tabs on me.

Nurses prediction, I should be feeling pretty good by Sunday.  I have another follow up next Thursday, but have been cleared in the meantime to shower.  Not sure when I will...I'm a little scared.  But, soon.  Jason says tonight.  We shall see. 

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Headache and head massage

This is the closest Jason's been to me in so long other than the spit bath.

I have a wretched headache and feel almost as bad as day 1. Those damn drains!!!

They're out

OMG details later, drains out otw home and in a bit of pain.

Love my doc and my nurse.

Here's my face after the drains were removed and I had made it back to the truck lol

On the way to remove drains

Well we finally made it off the windy roads and are now on a 4 lane all the way to Columbia. I'm a little sore and kinda car sick, hugging my pillow And dressed in NOT pajamas!
Ill keep you posted!

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Granny panties, tubes, and girdles!

Granny panties holding it all in

Granny panties down, all tubes and bulbs hanging out.

Lets hope all tubes are gone tomorrow!

Spit bath

So my darling hubby set the bathroom up to give me a spit bath tonight.  He got the girls to bed and then helped me scrub myself top to tail.  THEN he got a new razor for just me today and shaved my legs!  They needed it so bad!  He joked afterward they lost several shades of color shaved. 

By the time I was clean I was shaking which is what my body tends to do when I have done just enough to be too much activity.  He helped me dress and then brought in the office chair so I could floss and brush my teeth and wash my face in the bathroom.  Man! OH MAN!  Did that bath and a clean shirt feel Amazing!

So, I'm off to drain my bulbs, take some more pain pills and call it a night after a cuppa Sleepytime Extra!
Sleepy Time Extra

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Dinner for healing

Carrots, apple, strawberry, lime, ginger, cucumber, and mint on ice with 3oz broiled mustarded Salmon and a bit of guac! Bring on the healing!!!


I have no clue what I did to myself last night, my only guess was that in trying to strip my drainage tubes (tubes that are attached from my pelvic area) I pulled on one too hard or moved it just right to affect the area it is attached to.  I went to be in some pain and woke up feeling OK.  However, by the time I made it to the restroom and then to my chair I was in so much pain I couldn't even speak.  The use and projection of my voice hurt my core.

I WILL SAY if I have learned NOTHING use your CORE for everything.  I know as a trainer it is key in body stabilization and you need it in so many areas in the gym.  However, I never thought about it's engagement in talking, yelling, projecting my voice, sitting up and getting out of a chair.  So many little areas in life I have taken for granted the use of my core.  Yep, even wiping your gluteus in the restroom requires the use of your core and oblique's as you twist and turn. 

After I ate a quick protein pancake I took my pills and laid back in the recliner hoping for some reprieve after Jason drained my tubes.  I'm now veg'ing out to The Millionaire Matchmaker, something I never would have wasted my time on before.  I have been logging many hours with House Hunters International, Giadia at Home, and of course Duck Dynasty (guilty pleasure courtesy of April dear). 

Off to explore my options for a career in Naturopathic medicine as well as my Master's in Sport and Health Science.

If you're looking for some really good info check out my new favorite site, and please don't judge me if I repeat myself, ha ha ha, drugs...yah they do crazy things to the brain.

Peace out Yo!  As Charlee says.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Itching itching everywhere

Vicodin not percocet.  Thank you very much.  At least I do not have a migraine.  However, doing homework is going to be a challenge.  I'm going to rely on Motrin to dull the aches and pain throughout the day so that I can be clear headed and write my papers. 

Did I mention the itching?  I am not sure what causes it, haven't asked or looked it up, but I itch all over.  Especially under the girdle. 

Also, let me put this out there...I'm blunt.  I'm doing this to leave NO questions asked.  If there is something you want to know just ask me.  So, please don't be offended by my bluntness. 

I started my monthly cycle 3ish days early.  Like I really needed to do that in the middle of this.  YAY!! what fun right?  Oh and bowel movements, thankfully they have started...sadly the twisting to take care of cleaning business is nearly impossible so God bless my husband who has helped me out. 

Tomorrow is his last day home with me.  That, yes makes me a little nervous.  My ass sits in a recliner or walks bent over to the potty.  THAT IS ALL I DO.  Thankfully I'll have my little 5 year old here to help.  I can't wait to get to the doc on Thursday and see what they have to say about my progress. 

Time to pass out, Vicodin is taking over. 

Yay Danni and Jackson

I love the Biggest Loser and my two biggest picks were for Danni and Jackson for many reasons, mostly because I find ways I relate to them OR I see former clients in them!

Love this show! Go CF!

Day 5

So my body does not like percocet...and Motrin seems ok, it's just like a small dulling agent. With any luck today the doc will be able to order me something stronger.

I took a picture of what I'm looking at all the time.

I still get exhausted quick though. I slept all morning until recently

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Day 4 post op

Today is day four and all I want to do is get up and move. I had to quit taking oxycodone because it was making me have a migraine. So now I combat pain with Motrin. Not the same!

The itching, I was not expecting! All over body itching. And my legs sooo need to be shaved.

J says my bulbs are collecting less and less everytime which is good as that means I'm healing and close to having my drains removed.

The girls have been making me cards I feel bad for them because I know I am boring!

The only thing on my agenda today is a spit bath. I feel icky and would like a good scrub.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Day 3

Woke up with a migraine that I went to bed with. Pain pills aren't even touching it. I'm also sound and light sensitive :(. So I'm taking sinus meds and trying to loosen up my nasal passages that feel like they've been filled with cement. Oh what fun!!!

Just took my first round of pills for the day, sitting around on my ever faithful recliner, hoping the headache goes away and that I manage a bowl movement. Have plenty of painful gas rolling around in my guts. Here's to sitting on my ass again today!

Also check out the pimp fly walker designs my girlfriend sent me!

And lastly the amazing veggie juice my loving hubby made for me! Have I mentioned how much of a help he has been? Getting me to and from the bathroom, and yep wiping my ass! Making me all my juices and wrangling the kids and dogs. What a man!!! Not to mention moving the recliner from living to bedroom every night and back again in the am...

Friday, March 8, 2013

Day 2 dinner

Ugh... Hope I feel better soon. Soooo sore.
My dinner of champions kale, celery juice and note my drugs table.


Day 2/ 24 hrs post

So yesterday was not too bad, sans the car ride home. Today has been another thing! I overslept too long past the time I needed drugs and paid dearly for that. I have had a juice, a little soup, and some crackers.

Writing is a struggle right now.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

On the way

Well, after thinking it was going to be cancelled again yesterday I am on the way to Women's and Children's for my tummy tuck. I didn't sleep for crap last night, racing mind. Everyone got up and we were able to skip any major meltdowns thankfully. I packed the kiddos and my hubby breakfast for the wait as it all sarts at 6am and is expected to take 6hrs ish. I'm hungry but so ready to go. Ill check back when I can.

At home

The girls faces were priceless after seeing me in recovery. Granted I was a terrible version of myself with eyes rolling back in my head and unable to focus. The dear nurse gave me another med to put me back to sleep so I would wake up better. I remember telling the nurse I felt like I needed to put a foot on the floor so everything would quit spinning.

I showed up just before 6 and was in surgery by 7 ish. Great antisteahia and I was out before even getting into the operating room.

I am thankful for the girdle that was put on me before I awoke. I have drains hooked to the outside of my girdle and I'm wearing my super large pjs.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Less than 24 hrs and counting

By this time tomorrow I will be in recovery. So in prep to being in surgery and having my body be stressed I'm upping my vitamins and minerals through my food today.

What you are looking at here is a pic of my protein pancake (1/3c rolled oats, 1/3 c cottage cheese, 1/3 c egg <1 1="" and="" egg="" white=""> a dash of cinnamon, sea salt, vanilla, and baking soda) cooked in a skillet.  Then my super power food juice (spinach, cucumber, apple, and lemon).  I'm really focusing on overloading my body with healing food so that I can recover as quick as possible, and considering they have taken me off all my supplementation this is the direction I went. 
We are leaving for Columbia this evening and treating the girls to a hotel with a pool.  In the mean time I have a bazillion things to do to include packing and setting up the house, but first it's time to get my hair did.  My roots are grown out about 2 inches and this girl has a boat load of silver.  I figure better do the color while I can do it comfortably so that I don't look like an old lady with a flat tummy when I'm done. I could easily be salt and pepper haired at 34 if I wanted to, which I don't...Jason on the other hand keeps asking me to do it. 
Also, if you have any extra time you should check out LOVE IT!

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Books, books, and more books

It's about 4-1/2 days to surgery and I couldn't be more ready.  The nerves haven't set in like last time, however I am also steering clear of the weather channel.  Snow won't hold me back again, my new mantra.  We will go up Wednesday night and stay in a hotel since my surgery is now scheduled for 6 a.m. 

In the meantime I have been putting together a stack of books to read on my coffee table next to the recliner in the living room.  So far I have How to Be an American Housewife, which I am already more than half-way through.
I started The Last Town on Earth this past week and couldn't put it down, so I made myself in order to finish the first book I started.  I'm ashamed to say it's been a while since I read for pleasure, so I am looking forward to getting plenty of time to do that.  Between all these books and being only half-way through my term for Motor Control I'll have plenty of reading and homework to do.  

All I have left to do is to pick up my rollator (4 wheeled walker) and I should be set. 

Just 4 more workouts and I'll be without my ever frustrating skin flap.  It came out to bite me again today, so I'm more than excited to have it gone.  At the gym, I was doing a CrossFit WOD named Diane 21-15-9 dead lifts and HSPU (hand-stand-push-ups) and it was on my (modified off a GHD machine) HSPU's that my shirt came up and my flap came out.  Humiliating!  I am not the only one in the gym and being one of the ONLY women in there who does a WOD I get plenty of interested individuals, interested in CF or the specific movements that I do.  So, there's nothing like tearing through a WOD and just really getting a momentum and then having that shit come spilling out of my pants.  I'm soooo ready to not have to face the skin anymore.

Well, ok...enough procrastinating...I have another week of homework that I could get done so I'm not thinking about it all week.

Eat Well!