As promised...Pictures post steri strips

SO I AM NOT KIDDING BRACE YOURSELF OK....maybe that sounds Dramatic...however I find these pictures to be gore-y.  I'm lying down kind of crunched up so I can remove the strips at the time the pictures were taken.  I was itching so bad from the steri-strips that were still in place I just couldn't take it anymore.  I did them one by one and it was a process let me tell you.  A gut wrenching, going to vomit, gagged a little each time process. 

I am still quite swollen but happy.  Jason marvels at me more and more each day...and to be clear I am specifically meaning at night when I am in the shower at my most bloated.  He just keeps saying...I know you can't see the forest for the tree's but I CAN!  Have faith my love.  And if you don't love the way you look after the 6 months required to not have swelling we will fix it. 

He is just too wonderful for words.  So, anyway...brace yourself and look if you dare.

Right Hip

Mid-Center abdomen

 

Full-frontal almost all strips off at this point

 

Also, since I have been slacking, yesterday...Sunday this is what I did: :-)

 

 

Not as enticing as sex, drugs, and rock and roll however that was my day. I managed to sleep until 11am and woke feeling amazing...so I had sex...with my beloved of 18 years...not just a random person (just to clarify :)) and then we went to brunch in Rolla and to the library for research books.  Needless to say I spent the rest of the day in the recliner.   If you're in the area and looking for a brunch place go check it out.  I was pleased with my omelet. 
Benton Square



Can you say too much????

I couldn't take it anymore today and I asked Jason to leave the truck so I could get out of the house.  I went up to Rolla, MO with the girls.  I figure the sitting and driving doesn't bother me, so I would just take it easy and hit a few stores that didn't/wouldn't require a ton of walking.  Went first to  Nature Girls Health Food Store as I needed some arrowroot powder to use in place of corn starch and Jason needed a new bar of soap since we have gone all "Granola Crunchy" and don't use products full of chemicals that aren't meant to be in or on our body.  It was a cute little store full of lots of goodies, and the owner/manager (didn't catch exactly her name or who she was, just assuming) gave my girls each a pear that 'tastes like candy'.  They loved it. 

I was feeling a little tired but really, REALLY wanted to go to Panera for lunch.  In my head I saw it as going in, ordering food, sitting down, enjoying a dinner.  What really happened...walked in to find that the line went to the door, in good faith I held on thinking it would be fast.  I dressed much warmer today than normal (hence the snow and ice outside) and quickly realized I was going to pay for that.  My long sleeves, jacket and winter coat about did me in, and while I'm waiting I am being quizzed by my girls 'can I have....' blah 'can I get a treat?'....blah...I'm sweating, my abs are hurting, I am losing my patience just wishing I had someone to lean on.  There didn't seem to be a person in line in front of me who had ever eaten at Panera before.  I had to beg the girls in a stern, don't mess with me way...let me be, I'll order the food YOU NOW HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF ME!  Do you see the sweat on my face?  It's not there 'cause I'm feeling good. 

Ordered the food only to have to guy taking my order not be able to hear me because the worker next to him was having a coughing fit.  YEAH...just what I want to see happen right in front of where my food is made.  Many people stepped back.  Oh, and I forgot to mention the elderly couple behind me, behind me so close I could smell their fabric softener, I could hear their every word "oooh that cheese babka looks good Bob".  I wanted to scream and die but I was committed at this point and not about to try to climb the mountain of getting the girls out without a scene etc...

Finally, got our food and sat down.  T was a huge help once she knew I was about to lose my mind in pain.  I took some Motrin and peeled off some layers of clothes.  I was a little over cautious I noticed about people getting close to me, moving too fast, and just being to close in general.  Thinking HOW do I protect my mid-section?  OMG all these people and un-ruly, on spring break kids are getting to close.  I wanted my 6'6" husband and natural protective barrier.  People just don't get close to him.

We ate, we relaxed and I felt better.  So I decided to go seek out the Naturopath in the area I had been asking about.  After a few missed attempts I ended up just where I needed to be, Kessinger Diagnostic Center.  I have been needing to have my hormones checked since this summer and asked my regular physician to do it for me.  They declined as I have a blood clotting disorder and said it didn't matter what my panel said no one would treat me.  SO, guess what?  I did a boat load of research, read a ton of books and found out that's just OLD SCHOOL.  Away from the Allopath for this and head to a Naturopath.  Considering my family history of hormonal imbalance, and how I felt this summer, coupled with some new things rearing their heads (crying, crying, crying and now sugar cravings with a few other random things) it's time to get tested.  It's an awesome location, great staff, and I'm ready to go back and get tested. 
Kessinger Diagnostic Center

Newest favorite book I'm reading and cannot put down?  "If Naturopaths are "Quacks"...Then I Must Be a Duck" by Shauna K. Young Link to book here.  Changed my life in just 2 days. 

And, that's that.  I am home.  I am exhausted and I have a boat load of homework.  Hope you are all well.  I will post my pictures from the day I removed the steri-strips soon.

Prone to tears

I am an emotional jack-in-the-box, I'm an unpredictable mess. You cannot begin to guess what emotion is going to come spilling out of me at any given moment.

One thing I don't know is if this is related to the surgery specifically or what is going on with me. It's been a few days of this and there's no predicting when it will happen. Jason has seen me cry so many times today and there's no predicting it , he can be being nice or there was a moment of arguing and I was sobbing.
I am stressed because my class is 2 weeks from over and I have a 10 page paper due and a handful of essays but really there is nothing else wrong. Maybe I should research this some more.

I guess it could also be that I'm still recovering as everyone is quick to remind me. I guess, no I know that I think I should be doing more, going more, not wearing out so quickly...but fact of the matter is I'm still in recovery.

Maybe ill just relax. Maybe just maybe I need to be a little less hard on myself.

OH FML

Yep, I'm nervous.  It is my 2 week post surgery check up.  Jason drug a 5 gallon bucket into the bathroom so I could sit on it (positioned on a towel so it didn't slip) so I could wax my furry and expanding eye brows.  In the mean time I turned on my straightening iron on ironed my hair a bit so as to look like I had energy and now gave a shit about what I looked liked after almost 2 weeks in a recliner.  So, here is me plopped on couch ready for the 2 hour ride (note painting my Grandpa did of me on wall in background LOL)

 

So, we made it to Missouri University Hospital and Jason dropped me off at the door with C, my little 5 year old leading me in.  Thank GOD a nurse saw me all doubled over (seemed super worried that a woman was walking face down being led by a toddler) and so she was super helpful and got me this extra-large wheel-chair.  Something I noticed while I was there is these wheel-chairs are almost so large they don't fit through doorways! I didn't see a single NORMAL size wheel-chair. :(

Here is me all nervous (and drugged up, Jason after having my drains removed last week was worried about any trauma that may befall me today, so he had me take a pain killer and muscle relaxed prior to seeing the doc.  He was making fun of how relaxed my face was when he took this!  Look, sporting my Life As RX socks still!  My PS Resident who is handsome and I threatened to punch last week, (sorry man if you read this I still feel bad about that) and my Doc, Doc A came in and told me basically today is the day you stand.  I questioned them, yah as IF I know anything about it and tried.  I was so nervous I got up about 85% straight, got hot, sweaty and had to sit down. I tried again and then quit, we or I got nervous I may pass out.  Jason and Charlee were in there with us and Jason just kept saying how cool the incision was.  ANYWAY...funny story.  So Dr. A is just amazing and after I sat down I had to tell her this.  "So, Dr. A. I already told Kassie but I feel I need to tell you, and Doc (gesturing to the Resident) you'll have to forgive me cause you're a dude but you're in Plastics so I'm sure you'll expect worse.  Before my surgery because of the weight of the flap I felt like I had a frowny vagina (More like the skin above vagina, the PUBUS, that is the correct anatomical term) and NOW I look down and I'm like WOW I CAN SEE my vagina!  No more frowning!!!"...Doc A.  God love her was red, I am pretty sure the Resident blushed and Doc A pointed out I was blushing as well.  I just felt as though she deserved to know that that was ONE thing I had noticed almost right away.

So, Dr. A's orders no ointments or anything on the incision, let the butterfly strips fall off on their own and it will be about a year before I have the thin, white, incision line.  In the meantime it'll change some.  She also suggested I figure out a weight I'm happy at and not fluctuate a lot.  No crash dieting for fighting weights and be careful of the same if I wanted to compete for Figure or Body Building because the constant weight changes can lead to the stretching out of the skin again as we as women tend to hold our excess weight in the stomach and hips etc.

So, here is me as upright as I got yesterday standing outside La Terraza grill in Columbia.  I wanted some of their chicken soup and chunky guacamole.  I have had a serious decrease in appetite as my energy expenditure is way down but the soup tasted good even if I brought home 3/4 of it.

I have a 3 week and 4 week check up with Doc. A.  Especially if I can't get myself/make myself stand up 100%.  Although, today I walked around the house for about 20 minutes and did a few small things and it wore me the heck out.  Until tomorrow. 

I LOVE MY HUSBAND

I love my husband.

I must have the best husband in the entire world.  He has been making sure I'm up and in the recliner in the living room for going on two weeks.  He makes me whatever breakfast I'm feeling like (a juice or a protein pancake) and comes back for lunch, and makes sure there is dinner.  Oh, and it isn't just for me, it is for me, its for our two kids and our two dogs. 

NOT to mention he has done all the laundry, all the house cleaning, and all the cooking without a single complaint mind you!  What more could a girl ask for?  Oh, that's right, lastly a man who isn't above wiping my back side the first few days because I just wasn't capable.  I couldn't twist my body comfortably so he did the job.  Like he said, at this point we have 2 kids he has seen it all.  He will sit and stare at my incisions too when they are exposed.  He really thinks it's all pretty cool, especially the belly button.  Me, on the on the other hand, am glad I did it, don't want to stare at it. 

That is me standing at about a 45-90 degree angle today.  Steri-strips are still in place as are the belly button covers and my R side drain spot.  It's getting itchy so I'm sure that is a good sign.  Jason took that pic and he's all like "THAT IS SOOO COOL!"








And lastly, this is my home spot.  My brown recliner, my pillows, my two tables full of everything I need at my finger tips, my computer, and all the new crocheting stuff I am hoping to learn how to do soon.  Jason's on his way to get me out of this house.  He is taking me to Rolla to Panera!  What a big date!  But, hey it isn't my recliner!

Finally

Today I finally feel as though the meds aren't really messing with my head nor making me sleepy.  Maybe, that's because I haven't really needed any.  I'm moving better and feel all together good.  I have a CRAP ton of school work to complete that I think is going to require an extension as I was laid out more than I expected on those narcotics. 

I have to schedule a few more classes for the next few months and try to find a good program for Naturopathic medicine.  Jason is gone three nights a week now which is proving to be challenging when I can't move, but hope that as the weather improves it will be an abundance of girl time.

So, I'm off to do some school work.  FOCUS....FOCUS...FOCUS....

I'm back and let's just say time has caught up with me.  I'm beat.  I have so much more homework to do tonight, however I am not sure how much more I will get done.  I feel as though I'm getting better with each day.  I just finished my day with soup.  Jason says that I'm wasting away.  Good-bye CF legs!  I honestly think I'm going to go right into running as soon as I'm cleared.  I'll take a break from the heavy power lifting I have been doing for a while.  Not that I don't love my CF thighs, I just like fitting into my jeans :)

Off to try to read, or write, or be productive as my children bicker endlessly next to me. 
Eat Well.

As I type I am watching Eat, Pray, Love.  One of my all time favorite easy reads and good girl movies.  Under the Tuscan Sun was yesterday.  I figure by the time I can NOT sit in this recliner I'll have seen all the movies I love and wanted to watch again.

One of my drain sites wasn't fully healed tonight and I didn't notice it until I went to the bathroom today and I looked down and noticed I had bloody seepage through my new pajamas.  I unhooked my girdle only to find the seepage looked like red tinged runny mayo..gag!  I had T get more gauze and triple-antibiotic ointment.  I doctored it up and then placed a call in to the on call plastic surgeon.  He called me back, quickly finding out he was one of the 7 year residents who pulled out my drain, the one who I said to "I have to be honest my first instinct was to punch you upside your head when you did that!" (cut the stitch to my drain pre-drain removal).  He kinda laughed, and I assured him I wouldn't hit him, just that was my gut instinct because it hurt so badly.  ANYWAY, he assured me the drainage was normal sans there wasn't skin color change around the site, and it didn't hurt or have a foul odor.  So, looks good.  Still seeping some this morning but I guess it has to go somewhere. 

I woke up with noticeable itching on the suture site.  Hopefully all the good food I'm downing and all the rest I am seriously adhereing to is going to propel me forward into being able to stand up straight in a few days. 

I have my next follow up on Thursday.  Until then 2 more days of sitting on my posterior chain.